Thursday, January 29, 2009


Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind...and love all mankind as you would love yourself....From the book or love...

I struggle so with this. God has convicted me this year with 1Samuel 12:24...which speaks to me in the way of letting God into my heart. I have such a hard time. If you are lucky enough to truly see my heart, then I value your friendship. I don't allow to many people into my heart. But I realized I wasn't even letting God in. Oh He is there all right. But I am not letting myself feel that. I go through the motions at church, but don't FEEL it. I go through the motions with my spouse, but don't' FEEL it. I go through the motions with my kiddos, my friends, my family, but don't FEEL. That is something I am working on for this year. I am not sure how to do it. Just this morning my husband and I were talking about one of our children's friends. This child would rather be at our home. This child would rather have us as parents. This child doesn't get along with their siblings or parents. This child's parents don't care if they are gone all day....this makes me sad to the point that these parents are not missing out. While talking about it, I could have cried for this child. Wayne and I have felt for a long time that we would like to be the fun place to hang out. We are cramped with room. But we allow friend over. I so am looking forward to an adequate size house for Hope Blooms, so we can be the hang out place. The place where friends come, because there is food. Food for the stomach, food for thought, and food for the soul......children of all ages deserve to know they are worth something....I deserve to feel that for them...with all my heart, soul and mind.....


Saturday, January 24, 2009


Integrity is a result of God's work in us, in which the Spirit helps us to be conformed to the image of Christ, both internally and in our behavior. In a day when so many prominent people–politicians, religious leaders, business leaders, entertainment stars, professional athletes–lack integrity, it is incumbent upon Christians to seek to be whole people in Christ. Our high calling includes living out who we are in the world so that people might see God's work in us and be drawn to him through the integrity of our lives.

I received the above paragraph from a devotion. What I learned from that is...No matter what we are doing in our life; being a parent, church worker/leader, wife/husband, we need to do our life vocation with integrity. When people see God's work in us, they are seeing Jesus with skin on. Imagine all of God's workers with integrity. With humbleness. What a wonderful world it would be. Now if I could only remember this every moment of my life. Ü

In His Grip

Saturday, January 17, 2009

endings and beginnings...

Well, yesturday was the day. The beginning of college life, new adventures, the ending of life as we know it at our house. It was so bittersweet! But exciting to be sending off our oldest to college life, next August....oh the reality of that.

Another new I am drawing a close to Hope Blooms tax exempt form, I think we have found the perfect home and property to begin HB! Part woods, part house property, and part horse pasture. Once we saw this property, we knew it was the one, and getting to actually see it, really made a difference...we cannot wait to apply for grants for this place. What it will do for children that have gone through tough times! I cannot wait!


Friday, January 16, 2009

Heading North and West...

A little mixed feelings today. I am taking my first born to do his college physical endurance tests. This is so hard. Knowing next year he will be off to college. For the most part he has a good head on his shoulders. I remember how grown up you feel at age 18, but in reality, there is so much growing up you do in your 20's!

Reminds me of my dreams with Hope Blooms. We will be taking in more children; to love them, care for them, raise them, accept them; to just let them go off to college, and see them on weekends and holidays....the art of learning to let bittersweet!


Wednesday, January 14, 2009

I don't deserve

Matthew 8:8
The centurion replied, Lord, I do not deserve to have you come under my roof. But just say the word, and my servant will be healed.

This verse was on my desk top this morning. I got to thinking of the crud I do, the crud I say, the crud I think....There are so many things that bombard us as people, not to mention as Christians. The media has tons of things that we are so sensitised to. We are always watching things that we shouldn't. Our kids are hearing things they shouldn't at school, not just from students, but also staff! I think about the middle part of the verse above...I do not deserve to have you come under my roof....Dear Lord, I don't deserve to have YOU in my heart...But thanks for making the way!

In His Grip...always in my heart!

Friday, January 9, 2009


Today, about 3 miles from the newest property that I am praying about, that we in fact get for Hope Blooms, I saw two eagles. They were on the ground. One was eating, the other on the lookout for danger....IT was so amazing to see this. When they are soaring up in the air they just don't seem as big as they really are. They seemed to stand off the ground with ease. Of course I didn't have my camera with me. I could have snapped some wonderful pictures.

Then another couple miles down the road I spotted another Eagle up in a tree, closer than the first two. My observations: Three is the perfect number. Reminds me of the Trinity.

Also, back to the first two. They stood a few feet tall. I won't guess how tall, because I am just amazed to have even seen this site....But one was eating, the other stood guard. Doesn't out Heavenly Father do that for us all of the time? We can have no cares in the world, and He is always willing to stand guard. In some sense this is what we will do for children also. Stand guard. Many will have been hurt by abuse, neglect, maybe even the death of a loved one. We will sweep down, stand guard, and protect them for as long as they need us. Oh what an honor to do this for children that we don't even know yet~ Dear Lord may it be soon!

For now....

Monday, January 5, 2009

Taking the Wind out of My Sails...

After having a good day...quiet, spent with my husband, conflict arises...
I know everyone is different, and what I don't think is a big deal might be for someone
else...But to make me feel bad over it..that is what I have a problem with. My DH and I are doing a Bible study on marriage. I didn't realize the person in charge needed to know what specifically we are doing. I THOUGHT I left it as there were a few things we were toying with.... But this person thought we were doing one specific one...Now I ordered a whole different study...I have a hard enough time being friends with other women, then when conflict arises it makes it so much harder for me. Miscommunication...ugh! Makes me want to dig my heels in and say...I am doing the one I just paid 100$ for, thank you very much...But I was a good girl and emailed the two couples signed up, to see what they think...

So what helps you in or e-mail and let me know!


Thursday, January 1, 2009


Well, a fresh start...I am excited.
I am visiting the gym more this year, oh yes I am!
I am going to get healthy, oh yes I am!
I am going to be in the Word more, oh yes I am!
Hope Blooms is going to Blossom, oh yes it is!
This year, life as I know it; life as my kids know it, is going to change...Sometime in the next year, I feel as if I won't have just five kids....well, six if you count Wayne! ;) God will Bless us with more kids to love, accept, cherish, raise, and did I say love??? I am so excited to get this going...

I have the paperwork finished to file out 1023, tax exempt praying for the funds! God will provide when He sees fit! Trust.....

Got this in an e-mail this morning. Wanted to share. Some good stuff in here!

1. Faith is the ability to not panic.
2. If you worry, you didn't pray. If you pray, don't worry.
3. As a child of God, prayer is kind of like calling home every day.
4. Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not be bent out of shape.
5. Silence is often misinterpreted, but never misquoted.
6. Laugh every day. It's like inner jogging.
7. The most important things in your home are the people.
8. There is no key to happiness. The door is always open.
9. A grudge is a heavy thing to carry.
10. He who dies with the most toys is still dead.
11. We do not remember days, but moments. Life moves too fast, so enjoy your precious moments.
12. Surviving and living your life successfully requires courage. The goals and dreams you're seeking require courage and risk-taking. Learn from the turtle -- it only makes progress when it sticks out its neck.
13. Be more concerned with your character than your reputation. Your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are.
14. Do the math. Count your blessings.
15. God wants spiritual fruit, not religious nuts.
16. Dear God: I have a problem. It's me.
17. When we get tangled up in our problems, be still. God wants us to be still so He can untangle the knot.
-- author unknown

Until later!
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About Me

Minnesota, United States
I am a wife, mother to five children, 2 cats, 3 dogs. Hoping to be a mother to more children someday through adopting waiting children in Minnesota.